Wednesday, June 14, 2006

Welll its been a while....

Since i last posted. I had a scare last week. I had a stroke at 30 years of age. I also found out that I 6 pinched nerves in my neck that is causing me a lot of pain.

To be quite frankly honest, Im terrified right now. I have been in pain in my head since last week and I have trouble concentrating and reading. It is hard to focus on things without them blurring out or swimming on the page.

I have had a couple of MRI's and Cat Scans done. I will probably be having a MRA done soon. All i know is that i need something positive to happen and for God to help me though this.

I also worry about how this is affecting my wife. She is a worrier and this has her worried big time. I am constantly asking her if something is wrong but she wont really answer me. Makes it worse on me cause i think i have done something to make her mad and that raises my stress level alot. I know it is because she just worried but it still hurts when she wont talk about it. It makes me want to cry cause she cant open up to me about her worries and fears. I know that a lot of it is due to how I acted in the past but it still hurts and I dont think she realizes how bad it affects me.

I will be honest, the way I was feeling last thursday when this happened, I thought i was either going to die or have some brain damage due to it hurting so bad. Luckly so far, nothing permenant has been determined, but i have noticed that it is harder for me to read and focus on stuff.

All i ask for anyone that reads this is for your thoughts and prays....